I'll Never Be Like My Parents!

Growing up, many of us say we'll never turn into our parents.

But as we get older, a lot of us eventually resign ourselves to our fate-- I am sounding and looking more like my parents every day.

I think it's just natural. We learn to parent from the example of our parents; where else would we learn this skill? I had a wonderful childhood with two parents that were open-minded, inclusive, educational and extremely loving. Now that I'm a mother, I actually hear their words coming out of my mouth when speaking to my own child. It's literally like going back in time 30 years.

First, it's the silly things. I call her bottom a "bum-bum". I even said it in my aerobics class the other day when referring to the lower region, which was a tad embarrassing. That word came from my parents and I have not heard it in 25 years, but it came out naturally after I had a baby.

Also, it's the important things, like saying good-night to my daughter. Every night my father would always say: "Daddy loves you". If he got home late from work and I was already asleep-- he would whisper it in my ear. I still remember that, and I relished it. Now, with my own daughter, part of her night-time routine includes me telling her "Mommy loves you so much." I want Rosa to close her eyes every night with that security, just as I had.

Finally, it's the odd things. Rosa had a small melt-down the other day at her grandfather's house. Her nose scrunched up and she yelled out in tears, and I couldn't help myself but laugh. She's just so darn cute, especially when she's hysterical (or scared of her grandfather, who also thought it was funny!) Rosa's father Matt, did not find it funny and actually found us cruel. The whole point of this story is that after the event, I had a flashback remembering my own parents who used to laugh at me when I was upset. It was literally the same scene-- one generation later.

So to end this all... you can't fight city hall. Give it up-- we all turn into our parents, it's just our fate...but perhaps that's not such a bad thing.