Sam's Top 5 Most Annoying Toys

You know how you see a toy in the toystore and you think your son or daughter would just love to have it; Then to get it home and a week later you are tempted to take a sledgehammer to it's colorful, noise making, repetitious little head and bash it till the springs are flying all over the room. Oh yeah, we've got some of those toys in our toybox and I'm here today to name just a few:

5. So, see the piano that Mickey is holding? As you push on a key, Mickey sings to it, or 'La's' to it. This is really cute the first couple of times, but after hearing Mickey La-La-La-La over and over, especially not even to any particular tune it's enough to make you want to "La-La-La Laet ME HAVE THAT THING SO I CAN RIP MICKEY'S VOCAL CORDS OUT!"

4. I think the reason this toy annoys me is because it's located in our kitchen and the thing just likes to blurt out a farm animal noice at any given point. So, say it's 6am, you're barely making it to the coffee maker and a cow noice comes out of the blue. Jumps the bejeepers right out of me evertime.

3. Ah, it's a cute little puppy, and it's a learning puppy, it sings and it teaches and it's annoying as hell. It's loud and it seems to randomly talk to itself and scares the crap out of you and I can't seem to figure out how to turn it off. Even it's freakishly sensitive to movement and aiiieeeeeee! Fortunetely, Jordan's more interested in the non-signing, non-teaching real dog. Bubba's not real thankful for that, but I am.

2. Don't tell my son, but I recently hid this dog in the cellar. Besides this toy being too big to actually put in the toybox, so I have to stare at it's ugly face everytime I'm in Jordan's room, this dog also likes to randomly talk to itselt. One day I'm going to walk into a Dog-Learning conversation, they'll probably get so smart that they'll be talking about how they are going to take over our house. This learning dog seems to suck up the batteries like a kid with a bottle of juice, and then let the annoying begins. I'll just share with you what it sounds like if I may..."Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa! So, you going crazy yet?

1. I'm having a hard time even looking at the picture of this toy. I don't know if it's the annoying music it plays or the fact that if you don't immediatly answer it's question it keeps asking and asking and asking. "Where is the lion?"......."Where is the lion?" (music plays again) "Where is the lion?" I don't know, but I'd like to find a real one so that I can feed you to it!!

Like so many things in this world, I suppose your opinion could be different, one mom's trash could be another mom's treasure. This list is just according to me, the EXPERT (ha!), you should totally avoid buying any of these toys for your own child, you could if you want buy them for someone else's child, especially if you don't like their parents very much.